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Practical tips and tricks for building your coworking community and the things inside it.

How Coworking Community Managers Get a Cup of Coffee

It’s 9:00 am and you’ve just arrived to start your day. You notice there are some leaves on the front mat. But first, a quick cup of coffee will give you a much needed boost after the coworking event you were at last night that went late.

  1. Decide to print the conference room calendar to hang by the front door because that’s on your way to the kitchen. Open calendar.

  2. The phone rings and someone wants to come in at 11:00 am for a tour today. Check. Got them all scheduled.

  3. Open google calendar to make the tour appointment. Realize you were printing the meeting room schedule. Hit print. Toner low.

  4. Open Amazon and search for the cheap toner you bought last time. Oh there it is. Order 6. Check.

  5. Conference room calendar is finally printed and just as you stand up to go hang that up a new member walks in.

  6. Welcome the new member, introduce them around. Lose 34 minutes to a conversation about how much data we could theoretically store on the human genome. Learn there’s thing called a Petrabyte.

  7. Head down to hang up the calendar. Notice there are leaves on the front step. Give it a quick sweep.

  8. On the way to the kitchen, you see all the leaves that have been tracked in due to your earlier lack of diligence with the front entry mat. Determine to run the Roomba robot vacuum.

  9. Where the fuck is ROOMBA?!

  10. After an 8 minute search, locate Roomba stuck under a toilet. Empty Roomba, place him on charger.

  11. At last! In the same room as the coffee pot. It’s empty.

  12. Begin a fresh pot but first change the water filter because it’s time. While the coffee brews, it’s an excellent chance to tidy up the kitchen. Note to self: reach out to coffee provider to do a cupping event for members.

  13. Proceed to tidying. Find a gum wrapper on the floor.

  14. Open trash cabinet. Trash is overflowing.

  15. Take trash out and see a group of members heading out for a walk. Decide that you DO have 10 minutes for a quick walk around the block.

  16. Learn that when two female snakes are left alone for many years, they find a way to procreate. Ponder the end of the patriarchy.

  17. Return to get that cup of coffee. Pot is empty. Repeat steps 12 and 13.

  18. Decide to stay near pot and guard it just in case.

  19. Shit, it’s 11:00 and the tour just arrived.

  20. Give tour. Return to coffee pot.

  21. It’s empty. Repeat steps 12 and 13.

  22. Give up for now and return to desk to catch up on correspondence while it brews.

  23. 3 hours later emerge from email.

  24. Have a discussion with members about how late in the afternoon is too late/dangerous to have coffee. Conversation deviates to the virtues and drawbacks of having a dedicated decaf pot in house.

  25. You hear bumping downstairs. Goddammit, Roomba is off schedule again and has begun vacuuming the kitchen.

  26. Put Roomba back and re-program him. But first, find the manual so you can re-program him.

  27. Get Roomba sorted. There is COFFEE in the pot. Have a cup of coffee.

  28. Turn off lights and lock the doors.

Angel Kwiatkowski